Change Your Mealtime Paradigm

Mothers, do you ever find that your most frustrating times of the day are meal times? Many of us try to facilitate a sit-down meal at least once per day where the whole family is gathered--and we envision well-behaved and happy children sharing their day with us, lots of encouragement and laughter, and prayer and Bible reading around the table. Hello reality: demanding toddlers, siblings fighting over the color of their bowl, babies squirming out of their high chairs and crawling all over the table, hungry growly husbands sitting down and ready to eat while you are still running around dripping dish water, your hair all askew, trying to remember the forks, water, bibs, serving spoons, salad dressing, and the other hundred things that will be needed at the table. Right? Hah!

I recently realized that there is one main problem that is causing all the frustration, and no, it is not your hungry husband's failure to see that you need help! The problem, for me, is my expectation. The expectation that this is the time when I get to sit down and have a relaxing "break" while eating something tasty and nourishing. We have come to see mealtimes as such from our single days, and our days before children, and now this. Every day the reality beats us over the head again, and every day the frustration builds, simply because we refuse to let go of our old paradigm! Here are five tips that have changed my attitude, and I am ENJOYING our meal times. I have three children five and under, and am 8 months pregnant, so if it works for me, it can work for you!

1) Remember that Christ Himself came to be a servant. When you feel like nobody is noticing your hard work and that you are under appreciated, being treated as a servant, rejoice! Christ became obedient unto death. Motherhood is one of the best opportunities to practice Christ-likeness. Embrace it!

2) Think of meal times as your exercise time, not your time to relax. Seriously!! I have spent too much time lamenting not only my inability to get a sit-down meal, but also my inability to find a consistent time to work out. Hello! The two issues solve each other! Now that I am realizing that sit-down meals are NOT going to include me until my children are older, I happily do laps the entire meal if I have to, just thankful that my buns and thighs are getting much needed exercise!

3) Find another time to sit down and relax. No, it will not happen every day, but I find the best time is after the children are in bed. Then I veg out for a few hours, hang out with my husband, have a special tea or dessert, etc. This is also why I like having an early-ish dinner and getting the children to bed in a timely manner. And it is much more plausible than the idea of having your break at meals!

4) Eat healthy snacks between meals, and eat while you are preparing the food. That way you won't be so desperate for food that you add your own hunger mood swings to everything else that's going on. I like to eat my salad while I am preparing the rest of the dinner, so I am sure to get something healthy. Add nuts or beans to it so you get some protein. having a bowl of nuts and an apple handy on the counter is a good thing anyway.

5) For the sake of your morning sanity--and your electricity bill--invest in a really good coffee cup with a lid that will keep your coffee hot for hours. Don't you just love it when you have to microwave your coffee eight times before you even take the first sip? When my old precious travel mug--a gift from my husband--broke into two pieces after seven years, I was rather heartbroken. But after several days of mourning and denial--and unpleasant morning coffee--I bit the bullet and invested in a good new travel mug: In the $20 range, not the $10. (I got this one in fuschia--at Target) It is stainless steel inside, not plastic...that can't be a bad thing! And it keeps my coffee really nicely warm until noon if I need it to. It is worth it, ladies!

I LOVE what a perspective-change can do for your life. There is a reason the Bible calls us to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. God knows that many of the frustrations and problems we face are due to our own incorrect thinking. Be blessed as you make your husband and children happy at meal times--while keeping a smile on your face! It will be so worth it in the end.